Connection: The Real Reason People Seek Out Inmate Pen Pals

When most people hear that someone has proactively decided to write, befriend, or even date a prison inmate, they think it’s weird, bizarre, or unhealthy. So many people, not accustomed to the prison pen pal world, will ask, “Why would you write an inmate? Why not find a friend (or partner) who ISN’T incarcerated?” This same question recently came up at one of Big Steve’s therapy sessions. Why would someone proactively choose to look for an inmate friend, instead of someone not incarcerated.

After a lot of thinking and a little research, we now know the answer: Connection. Or a complete lack of connection, as the case may be. When men and women feel disconnected from one another in the free world (thanks in large part to technology) they turn to someone who may be more inclined to listen, more inclined to pay attention — a captive audience, so to speak. Much like Big Steve’s therapist is required to listen to his stories (because he’s getting paid) so, too, is a prisoner more inclined to pay attention to your problems.

In this episode, we discuss some of the research that has helped lead us to this conclusion. We learn about how people are spending much less time out of the house, and how technology is the biggest problem in so many marriages today. People don’t feel heard. Many people don’t even know how to connect verbally anymore. This episode will open your eyes and make you reconsider how close you truly are to your friends and loved ones.

We interview two inmates, both of whom are members of PenPals.Buzz and are looking for connections of their own. Marlon Mount, a writer and musician, is locked in a Washington State facility where he sits in his pod and waits for people to call him. (Just make sure you know the secret password). Marlon, who discovered PenPals.Buzz through a radio show called Sunday Night Slow Jams, shares his story, his hopes, and his dreams on the podcast.

Later, we talk with Ikemefuna Chukwurah, a Maryland inmate who has served over 22 years in prison. A fitness expert, Mr. Chukwurah hopes to one day host a podcast of his own and help educate today’s youth on how NOT to end up like he did. This man is a testament to how one can successfully make changes while locked up, and how a positive mindset can overcome almost any pitfall in life.

We hope you enjoy our second episode of 2025.